Tag: growth

To Ebb And To Flow

by almachristina1 Comment on To Ebb And To Flow
To Ebb And To Flow

ebb and flow

My friend, give yourself some grace. We are all hurting and healing and navigating happiness. It is entirely possible (and necessary, if you ask me) to feel all three of these. And it is OKAY. In the name of humanity. I’m giving you permission without you ever asking, just in case you have been feeling it and trying to figure it all out. We are capable. It is okay to hurt, it’s necessary to heal and it’s GOOD to be happy — about life and good health, surviving; happy for personal success, for friendship, happy that our kids are happy, or happy because we’re blessed with a capital B and thriving; happy about a fresh cup of coffee for goodness sake (me, everyday), whatever the reasons — happy. I think sometimes guilt seeps in for celebrating goodness when we should be mourning. But our lives allow for both. It’s entirely real to be healing from one thing and hurting for another, AND find joy every single day. AND, not OR. (Somebody’s church mother would say, “praise Him, anyhow” but that’s a different sermon for a different day.)

You might be starting to think about how this applies to your own circumstances. Although often hard to see, it is the beauty of life really, a blessing in disguise to face life’s ups and downs; to ebb and to flow. I read an article in the September issue of The Knot magazine on Elaine Welteroth and Jonathan Singletary. In the article, they eloquently describe their wedding day experience, and “experience” it was. Under the bold heading, “Black Life Matters” Elaine and Jonathan not only share the details of their wedding day but also beautifully relate to Black pain, joy and everything in between. Jonathan starts off by saying, “”It’s important to find peace in the storm, it’s important to find gratitude even when it’s difficult.”” Take that with you, friend, cause things will ebb and then they will flow.

I think we all have, at one time or another, heard someone say, “be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” And it’s always truer than true.

An extra two cents
On hurting: Sorrow, sadness, grief, pain. Hurting is human but it isn’t who we are, it doesn’t define us unless we let it define us. My prayer is that we don’t just go through it, we GROW through it.
On healing: Healing is my favorite human phenomenon. I think it could honestly probably be considered a necessary evil — honestly probably. Healing is HARD WORK. I consider it a courageous act to begin the process of healing; a miracle of sorts. Even if your wounds are physical, healing requires an inner work — an extraction of old habits and learned behaviors, a good-riddance to pride and the ego; a relinquished hold on the obstacle(s) blocking a new you for you; a cleansing of the soul and renewing of the mind. Healing is (transformational) change plus tax. Whew.

On happiness: If nothing else, with happiness comes relief. Choose happy if for no other reason than to push you forward. Look for the good in everything – it’s there.

If you’re interested in reading more on healing and putting in the work to do it, visit unapologeticallyauthentic.com. She has some fantastic worksheets included with each blog post that will get you on the path to living your truth.

Love,

almachristina

Deeper

by almachristina1 Comment on Deeper
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anyone recently taken the opportunity to change your life??

∗raises hand∗  »life-deconstructed, party of one«

“Change is the only constant” – unknown

a little bit of a window »»» Since my last post I’ve taken life as I’ve known it for the past five-ish years and basically created the opposite.  I moved to a new city and started a new lifestyle.  So, if my next few blog posts seem like they are coming from a construction zone it’s because they are (I was supposed to post this one like two weeks ago).  In spite of this, I am not completely off schedule from writing but IT FEELS LIKE IT.  I’ve missed you (say cheeeese).   Now that I’ve given you the gist on why I’ve been missing we can move on.

“When you learn, teach.  When you get, give.”  – Dr. Maya Angelou

I’ve been thinking a lot about (and experiencing) growth lately.  The idea of growing becomes somewhat complex outside of the physical aspect. As one gets older one realizes GROWTH means more than getting taller and even more than crossing into adulthood.    It is life’s natural order to grow and learn new things at a young age, but can I just say that learning new things, in uncharted territory, as an ADULT, is SOMETHING ELSE?  1) It requires quite the effort and 2) I will say it for all of us, it is scary.  There’s so much to be said on expanding your heart, thinking and speaking from a broader perspective, and essentially discovering all of who you are and all that you want to incorporate into who you are (I mean after all, we CAN choose these things).

I like to think of we humans as being multi-dimensional; maybe you just see it as having more than one passion, or (metaphorically speaking) as peeling back layers  — no matter.  Either way, one has to push and be pushed to find what’s there.  Thing is, growing, in any area, causes discomfort (pain, anxiety, etc)  — BUT, *lots of theoretics coming ⇒ maybe don’t refuse that discomfort.  That uncomfortable feeling is likely the result of some fear; possibly the fear of doing something you’ve never done before AND failing at it, causing you to second-guess yourself and the entire purpose of it all.  However, TRANSFORMATION is what we aim for in life, no?  To grow, to evolve, to become better versions of ourselves, to be that for someone else, to get the most out of life.  So, I, would like to encourage you, to experience new experiences.  Dive into the deep end.  Get out of your own way.

“We aren’t here to one-up one another but to help one another up.” – Ann Voskamp

No competition. No comparison. No cheating. No disadvantage. No disruption. No distraction.  Not self-centered → SELF-AWARE.  No doubting.  No hating (So 90’s).  Only opportunity.  Only love.  Only winning.

$ΘuNÐtΓ@©k

from two of my favorites: watch these videos !!!!

(artist: John Legend — song: A Good Night). Listen here (cue wedding season)

(artist: PJ Morton feat. YEBBA song: How Deep is Your Love). Listen here (sidenote: YEBBA beasts this)

 PJ!!!!!  ˜˜An ode to PJ:  You are the epitome of an artist.  You create music that is you.  It adds to all that this world needs.  We need your soul, your honesty, your crooning, your bounce and melodies, your gruff and grit.  Thank you for never straying.˜˜  I just came from his concert which was my first one in a loooong time.  The energy in the room is probably going in my top five favorite feelings ever and I’m pretty sure  everybody in the building felt the same way.  It was a sold out show and everyone was HYPE.  He’s straight out of New Orleans so go figure.  Still on such a high, I want the whole experience again!  In short, you should go. 

got a little carried away, hope you enjoyed my return.

♥♥almachristina