TESSA

(artist: Bryson Tiller – song: Canceled)  Listen here

Sorry (not sorry), guys.  This is primarily for my ladies.  

**disclaimer: this post is about identity and yet I can’t reveal Tessa because I didn’t ask permission.  The irony**

Inspired by Leesh. 
  

Who or what is TESSA, you ask? ————

TESSA is a mixture of women and identity.  TESSA is ‘Hey, Auntie’ and ‘Bye, Felicia’ in the same breath.  She is how we choose to identify and define OURSELVES.  And personally, I LOVE the correlation.  TESSA is who I choose to be!  TESSA is ‘GIRL’S TRIP‘ the movie (are you with me?).  TESSA might be Topanga or Alizè, to you (jokes).  TESSA is my sister when she changes her hair, or you when you change yours!  Don’t get me wrong (’cause I know any fellas reading this are ready); it has nothing to do with putting on a front, and everything to do with experiencing new dimensions of our true selves.  

"How 'bout dat?" 

We aren’t in conversation enough about SO many things and our identity as women and defining ourselves for ourselves is no different.  We can choose to do this DAILY (yes, everyday); or weekly.  Some of us decide every Jan.1.  Some of us don’t decide enough; we just go along (insert side-eye emoji).  I think it is best to remember that whatever we decide about ourselves, it is our own choice.  Another thing to remember is to do it for you and only you.  That last bit can be hard to face.  Most of us were born with expectations already set for us — for who we will become.  It could be that we’re almost 30 and still don’t want to disappoint our family or, that we’re living out a vision of who we are that we developed based on a certain situation or circumstance or, maybe it was something else — but you know that SOMEWHERE along the way you have fallen into some bogus, halfway-intentional, take-me-as-I-am-but-this-is-not-who-I-really-am version of yourself that was subconsciously driven by who you grew up around, or by the loudest voice in your life, or by someone else’s standard.  Yes, that is how convoluted our lives can be.  Additionally, for myself, I know there are things I want to change and things I never want to change about who I am.  Truth is, self-realization requires continuous addition and subtraction.  

Regardless if you relate to ‘Tessa’, we must decide our identity and definition for ourselves and our lives and then be confident in those decisions.  Heck, you can be who you wanna be.  I am just here to remind you that it is completely up to you.  Be courageous.  

"Hey, girl, hey!"

almachristina